Sunday, September 26, 2010

how to make a lot of money in India

Like I said in my last post that I've been studying about economics, business/project analysis like PESTEL, SWOT, investing strategies by Monish Pabrai....i won't go into the details coz I can fill this page up with jargons that can make you swiftly slide into a deep slumber ( If you can thank me later). But I want to tell you that whatever I am going to write is truly based on real principles and I did a considerable amount of research.  Well I did it for my own I found myself lacking in couple of important "things" that are related to "the thing" that I wish to do.

This post only affects the Indians.

Lucrative political side Business

Apply for a political post and fill up a form for getting yourself into your local municipal elections. The trick goes like this...make sure you intimidate your opponent only upto the point where he or they decide to kill you.

After you have intimidated them they will give you an offer to pull out.... bid well ...and sell yourself to a highest bidder and pull out. Don't get too cocky... that you are going to do good to the can't coz if you are reading this means some where deep down in you heart you know that you are a failure (not only in terms of being my books rich does not mean "to succeed").... You'd always be in a company of thugs and eventually you too will become one of them. If you become a politician....I won't be your friend anymore.

That's's a month of work, needs good acting skills and just by investing Rs.3000 you can come out with Rs.50,000 (for starters). You can always do this same time same date next year with higher deals.

What kind of investment gives you a full guaranteed 16.666% return in one month!

Cleaning business
If you don't mind getting your hands dirty and you want to do something where you can keep you conscience clear this is the job for you.

The data is based on current rates in the market right now...and I've talked to people offering services and also those who utilize their services.

It's freaking difficult to get truth out of people.

Cleaning Gutters: small gutters and chokeups in you home starts at: Rs. 1000. Larger gutter cleaning goes upto Rs. 7000. It takes an hour or two with men power of 5 to do the job on average. There is hardly any investment and it solely depends on man power. ( who pays you Rs.7000 for 2 hours?)

Cleaning Buildings: For a 4 floor building..with job that involves only taking the garbage out every alternate day and sweeping the floors...Moping goes only once a month....contracts start from: Rs. 10,000 a year per block. It takes an average of one hour cleaning a building block with team of 3.

Cleaning equipments are not your investment...the building pays for it extra. Any work which falls out of your contract is extra.

Removing Dead bodies of animals: Depending on the size of animal and where it died the average price starts with Rs. 3000 can go upto Rs.5000. It takes about 5 mins to do this job! usually 1 person is enough.

Here is what I calculated:

Say you got 8 hours in a day (we all know we work more than that!) if you have 8 building contracts means you get around: Rs. 220 per day.

Now on average there are atleast 4- 5 gutter choke ups of different sizes in a day...on average you get around Rs. 5,500 per day.

If you are situated near a high way or area with lot of dogs and cows are in for a treat.. say on average 1 animal dies near in a residential or commercial building every month. Rs. 3000 per month....gets to Rs. 100 per day..on an average.

So you total income PER DAY would be: Rs. 220+ Rs. 5,000 + Rs. 3000 = Rs. 8220 PER DAY!! that is  a whooping Rs. 9,86000 a year.

My calculations are based on weather conditions, festivals...number of marriage ceremonies and other parties that occur and affect this business through out the year.

A team of 5 will cost you around Rs.200,000 per year...and with misc expenses of another Rs.100,000 you still end up with cool Rs. 786,000 per year.

These contractors usually charge Cash and don't pay taxes. But due to their way of living you are fooled that they are poor! actually they also make money on the fact that you think that they think they are poor.

After talking to number of people in this business I found that they are not able to manage the money due to lack of education and usually waste it!

BTW they also have teams of people collecting cables and computer and electronic parts. They extract copper out of it and sell it. It's a lot of money...look at the rates of copper if you are into commodities.

How many of you engineers and white collar buggers make in a day! You can't even come close to this total.

So there it is...a plan to make money.... now all you have to do is invest Rs. 3000 out of your Rs.786,000 you made get 16.666% returns in a month and you can add those extra Rs.50,000 to your income....all tax free!

If you want I can provide you with phone numbers  of those people who are in this business in my city!!

I bet that you won't be caught doing "things" like this!! But on the other's a lucrative business!


Wicked Witch of the West said...

Wow, very interesting post! And of course being a numbers nerd I love the figures :D (and must google PESTEL - how on earth do I not know what that is?! :O) Ok, I am moving to India to be a cleaner - but will give the dead animals a miss for suuure. And clever and calculating about the political tactic!

Nice to see a post after soooo long (what is it with everyone suddenly blogging after months? you are for sure in good company on that though :P)

Anonymous said...

Hey hai!! That was an interesting sure did a lot of research and calculation :P

But wondering if I rather want to be poor doing some blatant white collar job...

Anyways how have you been?? And hows chum chum doing??

Sorcerer said...

number cruncher!
hmmm..I can clean up the junk Software codes..make the codes run faster..stronger..sharper! like a complan code.

Sakshi said...

Hmmm, interesting. For all those who don't want to get stuck in a 9 to 5 job and need out doors too.. it is an AWESOME scheme of things!

A-Jester said...

I am in as the case is that MBA aint gonna pay me much either

санжог said...

I cant say I am right or wrong that's why I wrote it...some one would atleast come out and point out something that I missed!

About the posting after a looong time. My brain was having a problem like the NSA's computer had in Dan Brown's digital fortress!! It was going in loops!!

I am still having the after effects as you can see from the choppy language that I used...


I think nothing else matters accept being happy!

Me is doing absolutely funtastic actually and how have you been?
I read your blog but it seemed too personal for me to comment so sorry abt not saying anything,

BTW it's CHIN CHIN!! she is doing great


Shut up sorcy....
LET ME TELL EVERYONE WHO IS READING THIS! Sorcy is already living his dream...we all are still searching for that Utopia...Sorcy is already there. One of the luckiest person this sorcy.


I was trying to learn "how to think fresh" and that I just have to look for "the thing".

@Ajit AKA Spider Man

It's true...but not true at the same time!

shanaz@MyReverie said...

I've seen dead animals on the high way left to rot and decay and "cleaned up" by the natural elements of nature here, Joe. Maybe I could open up a cleaning business and get others to do the job. Ha Ha Ha.

I see you've got a new look to your site. Very artsy background, did you draw it? :)